A gifted entrepreneur talking to a group of consultants recently explained why he thought his latest business was a success. The first thing he said he did when sitting with a potential customer was to listen. He said that this simple step along with asking questions led to a sale. The customer told him that he seemed knowledgeable and trustworthy and for those reasons he bought his product. I was surprised and impressed. In my previous 25-year career as a therapist listening was a necessary, key tool.
Do you know whether you listen well? First consider your own awareness, you have to know that you are listening. Next, you have to actually sustain listening during the conversation. Here are some tips based on how I trained myself to listen. In preparation for a conversation with someone
- Clear your mind of other thoughts. (I picture a blank sheet or space in front of me)
Next, when you are sitting with a potential client or someone you want to give your attention to
- Use your eyes to notice what the other person is wearing and how he or she moves
- Notice tone of voice, language use, and syncopation
- Follow the direction and content of the conversation
- As you do this, consider the meaning and any questions you can ask to gain understanding
And another thought to keep in mind, think how you feel when someone really listens to you and how powerful that experience is.