Recently during a radio program I heard someone say this about choosing a career, “don’t do it if it’s not fun.” This sounded like an impossibility to me. I remember times when my mother asked me to attend a social event, say a tea party, I would complain and say I didn’t want to attend because it would be boring. She then replied that there are many things that an adult must do whether they enjoy it or not. In other words, no fun. My thought then was if being an adult is like that, I don’t want to grow up! So now, as an adult, I still believe there are always chores and unwanted experiences in one’s chosen career and in life. I thought this was a given.
However, this suggestion to have fun must have struck a deep chord in me because I recently found myself choosing to change an unwelcome event that felt like a chore into “fun.” Here’s what happened. I offered to host a colleague who came to the area for a meeting. This meant that the morning meeting was at my home and my guest would then spend the night. I did not know her well. It was a busy time of year. I started to feel put-upon and harried. I chastised myself for extending the invitation in the first place. But I was stuck. I couldn’t gracefully get out of the obligation. I now had extra cleaning and cooking to do. My time could not be spent on something “important” to me.
As the meeting wound down I found my attitude shifting. This is when the message “don’t do it if it’s not fun” must have kicked in, but with a twist. I accepted that my day and evening were allocated for this visit. My next thought was, since this is so, how can I make the best of it, even enjoyable? I realized I had wondered what to do after the meeting with a person I didn’t know well. Then another thought came. One of the meeting attendees, a friend and colleague, was still present. I suggested that she stay for lunch. She accepted. The two talked while I finished preparing our lunch and then the three of us set the table and put out the food. Lunch was fun! After help cleaning up, I noticed that my houseguest was discreetly yawning. My colleague left and I announced I had some calls to make and some emails to go over. My guest said she needed a nap. We were both happy!
This pattern of flow, making time and events accommodating for each of us, allowed for fun to take over. I took my dogs out for a walk and began dinner. We each enjoyed a glass of wine and talked over our evening meal. After my guest left the next morning, I reflected that I had truly enjoyed the visit. I had gotten to know another person better. I’m sure she enjoyed herself as well. Best of all, I felt liberated. I had transformed a “chore” into a delightful time, perhaps for both of us. I plan on making more of my “chores” fun from now on.
A great website that succinctly captures the transformation of a chore or the mundane is www.davidhorne.com making things fun.